


I Loved You Once

by obisgirl



Category: Star Wars Episode III: Revenge of the Sith, Star Wars Prequel Trilogy
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-07-17
Updated: 2013-07-17
Packaged: 2017-12-20 12:26:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 622
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/887269
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/obisgirl/pseuds/obisgirl
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Several years after Episode III, Obi-Wan "Ben" Kenobi watches young Luke, Padmé's son and remembers the woman he loved but could never have.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I Loved You Once

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: Star Wars used to belong to George Lucas until he destroyed his own movies and then let Disney buy the rights.

Ben Kenobi smiled, watching an 11-year old Luke as he played with some of his friends. This had become his life, away from the chaos of the galaxy and the turmoil. He smiled, closing his eyes as images of the woman he loved flashed through his mind. Always in his dreams, Ben had seen her face countless times. Her soft brown eyes, long brown hair haunted him.

Years after he and Padmé parted ways, Obi-Wan never stopped thinking about her. Before the darkness, before Padmé became Anakin's wife, Obi-Wan felt the need to bond with her. Normally, if a Jedi wished to bond with another person, he or she would have tell the person and let them decide. But Obi-Wan didn't do that.

I think it was because I loved you but never admitted it because I was scared to, he thought to himself as he turned and walked back to his speeder.

They had spent very little time together but the moments they were together, Obi-Wan had to fight himself not to say anything, and then Anakin became the monster that was Darth Vader. Suddenly Padmé was forced to rely on Obi-Wan more to protect her children....He could have stayed and helped Padmé raise Luke and Leia and act as their adoptive father, but he was scared to be that close to Padmé.

"I was a fool," he muttered to himself as he entered his old hut. Ben walked over to the chest in front of his bed, opened it and removed a brown leather diary. He ran his fingers over the royal sea and broke his latch, flipping through the pages until he stopped at one particular page.

Before they separated, Padmé gave Ben her diary for safekeeping, in hopes that one day he could share it with her children and tell them about her. He smiled to himself, leaning back against the bed as he read through the journal.

_Dear Journal:_

_My heart is aching, I can feel the pain so vividly. I am aching because today I have to let go of my children as well as an old friend I've known for a long time. I love Luke and Leia very much, and wish I could keep them together but it's too risky. But I hope someday when things get better, they'll find each other and become brother and sister._

_I mentioned I have to say goodbye to an old friend of mine...I know I'll never see him again but I am so grateful and blessed he has stayed with me all these months and offered support. I owe him for so much but I can never tell him...._

_I think, I've fallen in love with him. He is so compassionate, loving and thoughtful and perhaps, a far better man than Anakin. I love him but I'm too scared to something but I fear if I don't, I'll never get the chance to tell him. I'll take my secret love to my grave and he'll never know how I feel._

Ben paused, looked up, tears in his blue eyes and then read on.

_Today, I have to say goodbye to him but I can't. I will die of a broken heart if I have to...In time, he'll know my feelings because before he leaves, I'm going to slip this journal into his pack. I feel, this diary, will be safe if it is with him. But if he happens to notice it and reads this, I love you Obi-Wan Kenobi and will always love you._

"I loved you once too, Padmé," he cried, "but I was too scared to say anything and now all I have of you are my haunted dreams."

The End


End file.
